When We Do More Harm

Trigger warning: This is directed to people who fall under the “Christian” label.

  • “Do you know Jesus in your life?”
  • “Have you accepted Jesus into your heart?”
  • “Who is Jesus to you?”

At some point in our lives, we are asked a variation of those questions. Often, they are meant to initiate conversations between nonbelievers and Christ-followers. Sometimes, they are conversations between fellow Christ-followers. These dialogues can prove quite fruitful and to be sure, the conversation must start somewhere. We’ll touch on the positive interactions another time. For now, let’s talk about when Christians do more harm than good, though they mean well. It is a hard pill to swallow, but often, peoples’ issues with Christianity is not Jesus, but the people professing faith in Him.

But first, who does Jesus say He is?

  • Luke 22:70 – Then they all said, “Are You then the Son of God?” So He said to them, “You rightly say that I am.”
  • John 14:6 – I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father but by me.”
  • John 11:25 – Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life, He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die.”

Jesus didn’t- and still doesn’t- need help to tell who He is. We know he came to our mortal earth to not only take the burden of our sin by dying on the cross, but to defeat the grave three wonderful days later. Jesus is the blameless Son of the Most High God, part of the Holy Trinity- Father, Son, Holy Spirit. Jesus knows who He is. 

But do we? Moreover, are we confident in our knowledge of who He is? That is the personal question each person must answer for themselves. Let’s make certain assumptions about mindsets to provide a general baseline to proceed upon. To us- us being the average Christian- acceptance of the following is necessary.

  • Jesus is the Son of God.
  • Jesus is God.
  • Jesus came to die for us, to take on the mantle of sin, as payment for our sins.
  • Jesus is the only way to the Father.
  • Jesus rose from the grave, thereby defeating it.
  • Jesus is blameless.

Now that we have this baseline, let’s talk about a few items where many of us indicate room for improvement.

Item 1: No one’s relationship with God is more exalted than another’s.

Pride is sinful. Proverbs 11:2 says, “When pride comes, then comes shame; But with the humble is wisdom.” Proverbs 16:18 also says, “Pride goes before destruction, And a haughty spirit before a fall.” James 4:16 states, “But now you boast in your arrogance. All such boasting is evil.” We Christ-followers don’t always get it right. But we all fall short of the Glory of God. All of us. If we were perfect, there would have been no need for Jesus to come down to us, endure the crucifixion, and then return from the grave. So, we all have testimonies and none of them are the same. In fiction, it’s said that there are around 7 storylines or themes that exist, and that all stories are variations of one of at least one of the 7. How many human beings are on this planet? A lot. Each of us has a story. That story transforms into testimony when we take up the battle garb that is Christ. In that each is unique, it is also the same. It is a convergence on the single doorway: Jesus.

Even after we choose to follow Him, we’re still plagued by this sinful world. We still stumble. We still doubt from time to time. We’re imperfect creatures. But within the Christian community, there are some who exalt their stories, who make their walk with God seem much more profound than those around them. They call the doubts and another person’s walk with Him immature or foolish. Have you heard or experienced something like this? Let’s look at an example.

A young woman, single mother, survivor of spousal and familial abuse, has seen her life turn around in the last year. She grew up in church, but fell away for about 5 years. A year ago, she felt God speaking in her life again. She started going to church, has gotten involved, and interacts with people about her faith with increasing frequency. One night, she has a conversation with a longtime, Conservative, female churchgoer. The older woman asks her, “Who is Jesus to you?” The younger woman answers, using her past suffering and her recommitment to reinforce that Jesus is her salvation. She does not delve as deeply into scripture, does not have verse and passage to reinforce what she’s saying. The other does not like this answer. The longtime churchgoer, thinking she is meaning well, over-saturates the conversation with items to make the younger woman’s story seem childish, not as profound as the long-time churchgoer’s because she has more questions.

Sometimes, we forget that God wants all of us in His corner. We do more damage and honor Him less by making our walk seem more righteous than someone else’s. Look, we all misinterpret the Word sometimes. And we’re all at different points on our walk. We can never learn enough from God. There will always be more He can teach us. But, some of the specifics of what each of us needs to learn aren’t the same as the next person.

Item 2: Humans are not perfect. No Christian is perfect.

Think on your experiences with church. How many of us have seen those perfect people, who always seem to serve God the best way, who never seem to struggle with their faith, who always are on their p’s and q’s? Their perfection is an illusion. And if we’re focusing on this, then our focus is on the wrong things. God is the focal point. Not the people in his congregation. Sure, we want examples of how to live a holy life.  That’s natural. But, we’re disregarding a rather important fact. If we acknowledge that no one is perfect- Jesus has been identified as the only perfect being- then, by extension, no Christian can be perfect.

Side note: In Christ, we are made perfect. I am referring to the impossibility of worldly perfection.

We can make our faith look good. Sure, we’ve seen too many television shows about makeovers to not believe this. Following God is not about making any part of ourselves look good. It’s about revering and adhering to our Lord. When we fixate on the aesthetics of our faith, we risk replacing the importance of truly humbling ourselves to Him. We also do damage to the Church because we’re magnifying our hypocrisy. What if I told you that every single one of us is a hypocrite? We want to be as like Jesus as we possibly can; yet, we constantly fall short. If we didn’t fall short, we wouldn’t need Him. We get it wrong. We say the wrong thing. We make ourselves ugly, in appearance and soul, at times.  I could go on about how this does damage to our task of seeking disciples for Jesus, but what about to those who are already part of the flock?

There are two sides to the problem. Let’s start with those who are fixating on those who seem like they’re perfect Christians. Everyone’s circumstances are different. Everyone’s backgrounds are unique to them. Sure, there are a myriad of similarities, but there are also just as many differences. That’s good. God uses all of us. He uses our unique skillsets to serve His purpose. When we fixate on those who seem to do it better, we are shifting focus from serving God and worshipping Him, to creating a sort of idol in our fellow Christian. We do not know what goes on in their head. We do not know if they are truly following Him or wearing a mask. The second side of the problem is the people who attempt the illusion of perfection. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not telling anyone to not attempt to be the best version of themselves as possible. I’m merely pointing out that the illusion of perfection is not sustainable. Thousands of years later, Jesus’s perfection is still sustainable. Know why? Because it is not an illusion of perfection. It is absolute perfection. When we are more focused on how we present ourselves, we lose sight of Him. It undermines our walk with God. It undermines our ability to guide others to the flock, because we become less human and more hypocritical monsters.

So, how do we fix this? I could share verse after verse with you. Instead, just look back at who Jesus said He is. Because when it comes down to it, when we put too much of ourselves in it, to the point where others leave the Church or don’t come to Jesus, as byproducts of our own actions, we’re doing more harm to His Church.

Let’s change that. Let’s encourage each other’s walk, offering guidance where it is truly needed, and put a lot less of who we want God to be and lot more of who He tells us He is.